Most of us up grow up in a society that rarely allows us to show our true feelings. When we are angry or hurt we are supposed to hide it or to show it very little. I used to grow up in a particularly rigid parental environment and I didnt dare expressing what I actually felt inside. This made a sick person of me.
I was also tought to care so much about peoples opinion. What people could think about me was supposed to be the most important, so if they thought I was a loser, it was supposed to be right and I just had to accept it. I spent years doubting my own qualities, torturing myself and my relationships with people have always been complicated at this time, because I was too shy to speak my mind. To all the people who are going through same situations than mine, no matter how old they are nor where they come from, Id like to advice : « Dont ever say yes when you intend to say no to people », because thats the best way to get abused.
I discovered the Marshall Mathers LP first in 2001 and thinking of Eminem, I spoke to myself : « See, heres a guy, whos been through harsh situations and whos not afraid to speak his mind. If you acted like him, youd certainly feel better. »
So i started applying to this, even in very conflictual situations and I started noticing that it actually helped me to feel better.
I began to realize that I had been the prisoner of other peoples opinion on me for too long. It was such a great feeling to be able to oppose my opinion to other people and « not giving a fuck » about their reaction. I began to regain some self confidence and to act the way I always wanted to.
For the first time in my life I felt like I was myself.
In fact, it is so much important to realize that we should never fake our feelings and to be real about everything.
Marshall has changed my perception of life, for sure. He has given me the greatest gift through his attitude and his music : being real. For that, he deserves so many thanks from me.
The biggest mistake is to try to please everybody by agreeing on things you innerly dont agree with.
You cannot force the whole world to like you, but if you keep real, you will certainly feel in total harmony with yourself and gain genuine peoples sympathy.
And for those who dont like me : remember that I just dont give a fuck about it.